Over the years I’ve worked with couples who threw out the rulebook entirely — replacing it with something real, meaningful, and entirely them. Whether you’re queer, creative, neurodivergent, or just allergic to beige chair covers, this guide is here to help you plan a wedding that reflects who you are — not what the wedding industry (or your parents, society, co-workers or anyone else!) says you should be.
1. Ditch the “Shoulds”
Full disclosure I have a personal vendetta against the word should – anytime my subconscious starts yelling ‘but you SHOULD’ at me I know it’s time to stop and take a breath. You don’t need to wear white, walk down an aisle, or cut a cake (unless it’s with a sword – then hell yes, let’s do it). Ask yourself:
- What would make you feel most comfortable on the day?
- What elements actually excite you?
- What can you skip without feeling guilty?
Try writing a list: “WTF We Actually Want at Our Wedding.” It can be surprisingly clarifying.
2. Source Your Music Creatively
Instead of booking through agencies who take a chunky cut, consider hiring local musicians, DJs, or even vinyl-spinning friends directly. You’ll not only save money, but also get someone who cares more about vibe than volume. The money you do spend will go directly back to grass roots musicians and we all know they need as much support as they can get!
Check out:
- Local open mic nights or pubs/small venues in your area.
- Independent DJ collectives in London and beyond.
- Instagram hashtags like #LondonWeddingDJ or #QueerMusiciansUK
Ask them what they actually like to play — trust me, the energy is so different when someone isn’t being forced to play Ed Sheeran on loop.
3. Make the Ceremony Yours
Don’t want a church wedding or a registrar reading the same old legal jargon? Hire a celebrant — they can create a ceremony based entirely on your story. It can include personal vows, music, poetry, rituals, or even your dog as the ring bearer.
Check out this guest blog post where Kathryn breaks it down. I’ve shot hundreds of weddings in my time and every time the celebrant led ceremony just hits different.
4. Choose Suppliers Who Get You
The right photographer, florist, or planner doesn’t just “do the job” — they vibe with your values. When you book with someone who gets what you’re about (and doesn’t bat an eye when you say you want to arrive on a bike or wear black), the whole day feels smoother, safer, and more you.
Bonus tip: Always ask vendors how they support LGBTQIA+ couples and what kind of events they feel most at home shooting. If they hesitate? Keep looking.
5. Document It Your Way
Spoiler: posed group shots aren’t compulsory. I focus on capturing people being real — laughing, hugging, crying, dancing badly — because those are the photos you’ll actually want to look back on.
Some of the most iconic weddings I’ve shot had:
- Pizza vans instead of plated meals
- Tattoos in place of rings
- First dances in the pub
- Ceremonies in living rooms, art galleries, and warehouses
It doesn’t need to be big. It just needs to be yours.
Final Thought
You don’t need to convince your nan, your dad, your hairdresser or even your registrar that your wedding is valid. You don’t need to do it “right.”
You just need to feel like yourselves — whatever that looks like.
And if you’re ready to plan something untraditional, unfiltered, and unforgettable…
📷 Let’s talk.
Non Traditional Wedding Photography 